Author Topic: Kids say the darnedest things...  (Read 24991 times)

Offline gillianren

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Re: Kids say the darnedest things...
« Reply #135 on: September 22, 2020, 10:59:26 AM »
Every night, Irene asks me to read her a story and sing her five songs, because five is her favourite number.  This is a pleasant change from Simon, who would whine at me to stop singing.
"This sounds like a job for Bipolar Bear . . . but I just can't seem to get out of bed!"

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Offline Peter B

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Re: Kids say the darnedest things...
« Reply #136 on: September 23, 2020, 05:27:20 AM »
Despite my accomplishments, I can't even begin to fathom the task of explaining a pandemic to a preschooler.  My brother turned 40 today.  He has a brood ranging from 7 to 14.  He's a wonderful parent, and so is his delightful wife.  They are my heroes.

Obviously my youngest is older than a pre-schooler, but at the start of the lockdown back in March (sheesh, that long ago?) my wife and I had a conversation about the virus with our kids after dinner one night. We explained things in fairly simple terms, and tried to walk the line between downplaying the danger and scaring them. We kept the initial explanation to only a few minutes and told them to go away and have a think about it, and then ask any questions at dinner the following night.

The key for us was getting our understanding of the facts into their brains before they picked up any whacky or misunderstood concepts from their classmates (or jittery parents).

It helped that we usually have a decent conversation at most dinners about all sorts of topics - quite often something I've read in the news that day. So they were already receptive to the idea of listening while I talk (which I can get away with because they're usually still eating) and then asking questions after that.

It's also helped that Canberra has experienced so little direct effect from the virus - it's nearly 11 weeks since the last case was recorded, a few months since the last death - and the preventive measures are pretty mild. Here's hoping we can keep this up until a vaccine arrives.

Offline gillianren

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Re: Kids say the darnedest things...
« Reply #137 on: September 23, 2020, 12:51:10 PM »
Oh, explaining to Simon has been way easier.  He's pretty much on top of things.  Irene, not so much.

Meanwhile, one of Simon's former classmates, who I think of as his "best frenemy," sent the message through her mom--one of my Facebook friends since the kids were in preschool together--that she missed him.  I told him this yesterday, and Irene responded with, "She misses me, too!"  Ellie's mom says that Ellie came back with, "I can't remember her name, but sure, I miss her.  I miss everyone."
"This sounds like a job for Bipolar Bear . . . but I just can't seem to get out of bed!"

"Conspiracy theories are an irresistible labour-saving device in the face of complexity."  --Henry Louis Gates

Offline JayUtah

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Re: Kids say the darnedest things...
« Reply #138 on: September 24, 2020, 07:59:39 PM »
It's also helped that Canberra has experienced so little direct effect from the virus - it's nearly 11 weeks since the last case was recorded, a few months since the last death - and the preventive measures are pretty mild. Here's hoping we can keep this up until a vaccine arrives.

That's looking like an attractive refuge as we slowly become Amerika.  My state alone recorded nearly 1,200 new cases just today.  My brother's eldest daughter turned 13 today.  I talked to him recently.  They're coping by doing a lot of outdoor activities that lets them keep distance.

"Facts are stubborn things." --John Adams

Offline Bryanpoprobson

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Re: Kids say the darnedest things...
« Reply #139 on: October 03, 2020, 04:23:01 PM »
Not a case of saying funny things, but I have several things to say about my 5 y o granddaughter Eva, here is a good thing from her. At the start of lockdown she started her own veggie patch in the garden. We have had carrots, peas, runner beans, peppers, chillis. Here is the latest offering to ripen, and she has done it with very little help from the adults.

"Wise men speak because they have something to say!" "Fools speak, because they have to say something!" (Plato)

Offline Peter B

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Re: Kids say the darnedest things...
« Reply #140 on: October 27, 2020, 09:20:37 AM »
The importance of a good vocabulary

During the school holidays Mummy has to take all three kids with her to her physiotherapist appointment. Mummy explains to the physio how she's bought a replacement seat for her exercise bike because the old one gave her a sore bum.

Shrieks of delighted outrage from the kids.

7YOD: Mummy said 'bum'!

Mummy (rolling her eyes): Yes, you don't often hear me say butt, bum or bottom.

More shrieks of delight from the kids.

10YOS: Mummy just said three words for posterior!

Offline gillianren

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Re: Kids say the darnedest things...
« Reply #141 on: November 07, 2020, 11:14:16 AM »
[kids knock on our door first thing this morning]

Graham: "We're not letting you in."

Simon: "Why not?"

Me: "Did you ever consider that we might like some time to ourselves?  We just woke up."

Simon:  "Well--!"  [storms off]

Graham: "Good comeback, Simon."
"This sounds like a job for Bipolar Bear . . . but I just can't seem to get out of bed!"

"Conspiracy theories are an irresistible labour-saving device in the face of complexity."  --Henry Louis Gates

Offline gillianren

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Re: Kids say the darnedest things...
« Reply #142 on: November 10, 2020, 11:04:13 AM »
"No, you can't watch TV until after Simon's school and you've done your work.  You know the rules."

[angry heavy breathing]  "I don't want rules!"
"This sounds like a job for Bipolar Bear . . . but I just can't seem to get out of bed!"

"Conspiracy theories are an irresistible labour-saving device in the face of complexity."  --Henry Louis Gates

Offline Peter B

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Re: Kids say the darnedest things...
« Reply #143 on: December 03, 2020, 03:31:42 AM »
Humour crisis...

The school our 7YOD and 10YOS attend had its Christmas Concert this afternoon (keeping in mind we're reaching the end of the school year too). My wife and I attended, along with 13YOS.

One of the show presenters, a Year 6 boy, was incessantly telling really bad Christmas-themed Dad jokes, while his fellow presenters offered appropriately dismal reactions. 13YOS didn't catch most of the jokes because of the background noise, so I repeated them for him.

Me: What do you call an old snow man?

13YOS: What?

Me: Water.

13YOS: Oh dear...

Offline gillianren

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Re: Kids say the darnedest things...
« Reply #144 on: December 03, 2020, 11:38:53 AM »
We had school picture day yesterday, which was quite the experience given we're still distance learning.  But Simon made friends, and they exchanged gamer tags on Minecraft so they could keep track of one another.
"This sounds like a job for Bipolar Bear . . . but I just can't seem to get out of bed!"

"Conspiracy theories are an irresistible labour-saving device in the face of complexity."  --Henry Louis Gates

Offline Peter B

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Re: Kids say the darnedest things...
« Reply #145 on: January 23, 2021, 12:40:20 AM »
8YOD has asked if she could do drama classes this term, "Because I do really dramatic death scenes."

Offline raven

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Re: Kids say the darnedest things...
« Reply #146 on: January 23, 2021, 04:25:08 AM »
8YOD has asked if she could do drama classes this term, "Because I do really dramatic death scenes."
She'll love Shakespeare then! ;D Probably a bit young for knowing what all the jokes mean though.

Offline gillianren

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Re: Kids say the darnedest things...
« Reply #147 on: January 23, 2021, 12:38:33 PM »
Yeah, you've got to wait until they're at least ten for that.
"This sounds like a job for Bipolar Bear . . . but I just can't seem to get out of bed!"

"Conspiracy theories are an irresistible labour-saving device in the face of complexity."  --Henry Louis Gates

Offline Peter B

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Re: Kids say the darnedest things...
« Reply #148 on: January 23, 2021, 06:17:39 PM »
8YOD has asked if she could do drama classes this term, "Because I do really dramatic death scenes."
She'll love Shakespeare then! ;D Probably a bit young for knowing what all the jokes mean though.

Oh absolutely.

We've got a book of all Shakespeare's plays and every so often I pull it out and read some of the more famous soliloquys from it (modernising the language as I go) while they're eating dinner.

I've also got a book with the screenplay of Sir Ian McKellen's film version of Richard III, which I used to unpackage Richard's opening soliloquy for 10YOS. He can also do the amateur dramatics when he wants to, but also has just enough extra years to understand what I was explaining and then ask intelligent questions of his own.

Offline raven

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Re: Kids say the darnedest things...
« Reply #149 on: January 23, 2021, 08:10:36 PM »
8YOD has asked if she could do drama classes this term, "Because I do really dramatic death scenes."
She'll love Shakespeare then! ;D Probably a bit young for knowing what all the jokes mean though.

Oh absolutely.

We've got a book of all Shakespeare's plays and every so often I pull it out and read some of the more famous soliloquys from it (modernising the language as I go) while they're eating dinner.

I've also got a book with the screenplay of Sir Ian McKellen's film version of Richard III, which I used to unpackage Richard's opening soliloquy for 10YOS. He can also do the amateur dramatics when he wants to, but also has just enough extra years to understand what I was explaining and then ask intelligent questions of his own.
My family would watch a lot of Shakespeare movies growing up (my favourites were Twelfth Night with  Ben Kingsley and Much Ado About Nothing With Emma Thompson) and my older sister and I would quote back and forth to each other long passages from them.  Cue 20 years later, and I'm in local community theatre, though my memorization skills are not, alas, what they were then.